


you took me by surprise.

by j_whirl44



Category: Rusty Quill Gaming (Podcast)
Genre: First Kiss, Mopey Barnes, Other, two idiots trying to figure shit out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:00:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27977745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/j_whirl44/pseuds/j_whirl44
Summary: Barnes blew it. He tries to fix that.
Relationships: Commander James Barnes/Celiquillithon "Cel" Sidebottom
Comments: 16
Kudos: 43





	you took me by surprise.

There’s no way to hide it, Barnes is moping. He holds his drink in hand and swashes it around as he sits by the fire made in the corner of the bunk room. He takes a long sip of it and lets out a disgruntled sigh.

That could’ve gone better, he thinks. Cel is… Cel has been such a force to reckon with ever since they met all that time ago. They crackle like lightning and they’re so strong in their convictions. Not to mention, they are pretty easy on the eyes, which is to say that it doesn’t take long for people to notice Cel Sidebottom, and Barnes is no exception.

So this is why he’s sitting all alone with a sour mood. The ball was very obviously handed to him, and he dropped it with his heavy tongue and tired, shocked mind.

_ ‘It suits you,’ _ they said. It’s not only that they said that though, it’s the way they did. So casual and light and the look in their eyes so sparkling and determined. He didn’t know how to handle it. So he just flat out didn’t.

In front of  _ everyone _ .

Everyone gave him a look, some like Azu and Siggif, were looks of pity. Others, like Carter, Wilde, and Zolf, were shit eating. One, from Sassraa, looked almost threatening. When he finally excused himself from the table, he could feel the red on his face and he announced his departure with such a squeak in his throat it sounded like he was choking.

He lets out another annoyed sigh as he takes another sip from his drink and puts his face in his free hand, closing his eyes.

It’s been a while since this type of thing even happened. It’s been a long time since… since the one he lost at sea. The one who still does have a tight grip on his mind and his heart, but it’s a grip, he admits, that has been loosening since Cel.

He doesn’t know when it started, maybe when they were stuck on babysitter duty for Carter on the ship, maybe a long time before that. He can admit to a silent room that sometimes at night he’d think back on conversations he had with them and just bask in how intelligent they are. Those nights he usually falls asleep with a smile.

In fact, one creeps up on his face now until he remembers he’s supposed to be annoyed so he turns it down, biting the inside of his cheek and clenching his hand to level himself.

He turns to his side and refills his drink. He stares into the glass and gets lost in a sort of trance as he hears footsteps approach.

He sighs, “Carter if you’ve come here to-” he cuts himself off when he hears a familiar laugh that’s definitely not from his resurrected friend. He turns around to see them, “Oh, Cel, uh, h-hi,” he says.

He begins to stand up, nearly spilling his drink in the process, “I was just uh, thinking, uh, I don’t know I’m sorry if I left abruptly uh I don’t know uh… I think it’s best if I stop. Talking now. Sorry,” he says. Cel’s smile grows wider but they try to hide it by biting their lip. Which is considerably a worse thing for him to see, if he’s honest.

They take a small step forward and he almost takes a step back but, no, he thinks that’d be stupid. He wants to try and be less stupid right now. If he can manage it.

“James,” they say. They continue to inch closer and Barnes relaxes. He sets his drink down on the table next to him and takes a small step forward. “I am sorry if I… embarrassed you in there that really wasn’t my intention. I just,” they pause as the both of them are now so close their chests almost touch. One small movement from either of them could be dangerous. He holds his breath. “If I made you uncomfortable in any way. I-I I can stop,” they continue. He can see now that their eyes are a bit wider than normal and there’s hesitation in their movements. His heart tugs. On top of everything, he now just feels ashamed. “I just, I-I like you, Barnes, you’re a good… good person and I just- I’m so old,” they laugh nervously, he shows the faintest hint of a smile. They smile back, “I’m so old and I don’t have the filter I used to when it comes to… comes to some things,” they finish.

He doesn’t really know how to respond. His throat is try and he immediately feels like he did back at the table, just so blindsided by their honesty.

And blindsided by the way that honesty makes  _ him _ feel.

Cel’s eyes fall as they take a step back. He kicks himself.  _ ‘Too slow again you useless lug,’ _ he thinks to himself.

They begin to turn and that's all the motivation he needs.  
  
He reaches out and grabs their wrist. Cel yelps in surprise as he spins them back around and pulls them in. Their lips meet.

It’s nothing too scandalous and Barnes barely has enough time to reposition his arms around them before they pull apart, but Cel doesn’t move from the embrace. Which is promising.

Now it’s their turn to look surprised and blushy and there’s a blush so high on their cheeks that gives him confidence enough to lean in again.

The second kiss is longer and more settled. Cel’s hands make their way around his neck, resting just below his hairline. He leans into them a little further and he can feel them smile into it. He does too.

They break apart and Cel is still smiling. They don’t meet his eyes right away as they both try and just take a moment to process what just happened. He gently runs his thumbs along where they’re planted on their back and Cel laughs a little.

“Well that was… unexpected,” they say.

“Yeah, it was,” he replies.

“You don’t... James I just want to make sure-”

“Cel I like you too,” he states plainly, cutting off what was probably about to be another word vomit from them with a smile.

They finally look at him again with straight surprise in their eyes. He smirks now, confidence he wished he had about thirty minutes ago returning to him.

Though he thinks this outcome is just fine.

“Oh. Good. I, uh, well then we can… make this more official,” they say.

His eyes widen, “Oh I don’t think I’m there-”

“Oh! No no no i’m sorry I didn’t mean- I of course not, no that’s not what I- oh gosh um, no I meant like a date… situation,” they all but screech out.

“Oh. Right,” he says, “No yeah that sounds good then.”

“Really?” Cel asks.

He nods, “Really,” he affirms.

Cel smiles and after a moment leans in to kiss him quickly. “Great. First date. Simple! Casual!” 

“ _ Your _ simple casual or  _ most _ people’s simple casual,” he quips. It’s a light jab that makes Cel laugh that maniacal laugh they sometimes do and his stomach flips.

They wink, “it’s best not to ruin the surprise.”

He laughs a hard belly laugh as they finally pull away from each other. He looks back at the set aside drink and turns to them, “Do you want to stay and… sit awhile,” he asks.  
  
They smile, “I would but, I have a date to plan it seems,” they answer. They give another wink and Barnes can’t help but laugh and nod his head. 

They stand there a moment before running back up to him and giving him a kiss on the cheek. They’re out the door just a quick and Barnes finds himself standing there in a mixture of awe and confusion. He laughs and shakes his head.

The smile is on his face the rest of the night.

**Author's Note:**

> :vibrates: i had a much more sad CelBarnes first kiss planned during break but I just couldn't write it i'm so glad i waited, apparently.
> 
> anyways I do in fact have a CelBarnes playlist now.......so [listen](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6b0iXr7iCsw0ICL32TpJgm?si=j5kZXMHgQ3SxKT1zmTIXLA) here if you'd like.
> 
> Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed :D


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